Horror, Again.

Evidently, I am STILL obsessed with zombies.

More specifically, I am obsessed with horror movies. That is to say, my chances of survival should I find myself in one.

(I blame thesis, and impending law school. Always handy to blame).

Take your average horror movie (depending on the genre), and take my odds:

1. Virgin.
If the monster is Japanese and has anything RESEMBLING tentacles, I'm F'd (Literally. Horribly. Agonizingly). If it involves psychopathic serial killers/slashers, there's a good chance I'm saved (or at least, not the first one to die). If I star in a mawkish, teenage vampire drama, before I can say OMG-he-SPARKLES...yeah. I'd rather shoot myself.

2. "Rich" City girl.
No doubt, I'd be offed in the woods in a second. Dude, I don't even know how to BIKE.

3. Slightly Asthmatic.
The zombies may outrun me.

4. Erstwhile fencer.
Then again, my "useless" sport should prove to be somewhat useful if there happens to be a shiny, pointy, holy-water anointed thing lying around somewhere, and in a fatal lunge, I end up skewering the demon-prince. Er. RIGHT.

5. Journalism major.
This can go two ways. Either I provide key clues as the plot rolls along (thanks to nifty research), or I'm the idiot who unleashes the unspeakable evil in the first place. Judging by my track record...I go for the latter.

6. Catholic.
Operates chiefly like the "virgin" characteristic.

and last but not the least,
7. Filipino.
Filipino=Asian.
Asian=ethic minority.
Ethic minority=NEVER SURVIVES IN A HORROR FILM.
Yep. I'm screwed.